ATT ÅTERVÄNDA
Ända sedan jag kom tillbaka från USA har jag funderat på om jag skulle åka tillbaka nu i sommar. Klart att jag ville träffa alla kompisar, familj och hundar igen, men jag tvekade. AFS hade rekommenderat att man skulle vänta 2 år innan man åkte tillbaka för annars kan "gamla sår" rivas upp igen, vilket gjorde mig orolig. Jag visste hur jobbigt jag hade haft det när jag kom tillbaka till Sverige och jag var rädd att uppleva det igen. Men sen insåg jag att jag bara tänkte på allt negativt som kunde hända, istället för att tänka på allt det positiva med att åka tillbaka.
Jag funderade på om jag skulle lägga de pengarna på något annat, någon annan resa. Jag älskar USA men jag vill inte lägga pengar på att åka till USA hela tiden när det är så många andra länder jag också vill resa till. Denna gången kommer jag nog inte tillbaka till USA på flera år, jag kanske ändrar mig, men just nu vill jag studera, jobba, spara pengar och resa. Det sved att tänka på när jag lämnade den här gången, att veta att jag inte kommer komma tillbaka på ett lååångt tag den här gången.
Men gissa vad? Det kändes som om jag aldrig lämnat.
Det kändes som denna återvändo var som en extended bit av mitt utbytesår, som att jag bara förlängde förra året med några avsnitt typ. Vi åt middag vid vårt matbord hela familjen nästan varje kväll, jag lekte med hundarna, badade i poolen och bara gick runt mitt neighbourhood. Jag tog en Starbucks med mina vänner, åt Cold Stone's med Mom, tog en roadtrip ner till L.A med Mary och Chelsea. Allt var sig likt.
Det enda jag tyckte var lite jobbigt var att se min gamla skola igen. Jag saknade den så mycket och ville bara återuppleva en dag på den, bara en dag. En annan grej som kändes lite tråkig var att min pojkvän jag hade haft när jag var i USA nu hade en ny flickvän. På grund av att han hade flickvän nu så kunde jag tyvärr inte träffa honom lika mycket som jag hade velat, och det förstår jag men jag tyckte det var lite synd såklart.
Men jag är glad att jag åkte tillbaka och jag ångrar det inte alls. Det kändes som att jag fick ett annat slags "avslut" nu genom att återvända. Nu vet jag var jag har allihopa. Nu vet jag säkert att USA, min familj och mina vänner alltid kommer finnas där och att jag inte behöver oroa mig.
Hiking up to Twin Lakes med Dad
Jag och Oly
Jared & Tilly
Mary, Chelsea och jag @ Santa Monica
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